All the things I’ve learned about surfing in 15 years as a perpetual beginner

It’s my birthday today. A brilliant excuse for reflection. For a while now, I’ve wanted to write a retrospective on what I’ve learned since I got into surfing. It’s been a while—more than 15 years. Okay, 17 years. But you wouldn’t know it from the way I surf. I’m a beginner in perpetuity.

Surfing came into my life at a time when I already had another, all-consuming riding passion. Horses. I rode English. I rode Western. I jumped. I rounded up cattle. I’d spend all my vacation on horses, literally and figuratively.

Surfing is the choice you make

I watched “Riding Giants” by Stacy Peralta a couple (?) years before my first surfing lesson in Porthcawl, Wales, UK, and it was genuinely a life-changing experience. I just didn’t know it then. I was fascinated by ancient Hawai’i, mesmerized by Mavericks, and obviously in love with Laird Hamilton. No issue there, so was my husband. We started spending our weekends surfing with a group of surfing beginners from London, driving to Wales, Devon and Cornwall. Every weekend was about surfing. Rain or shine. Summer or winter. Carrying our surfboards six flights of narrow stairs into our tiny London apartment with pride. Surfing made me feel like being part of some secret society, as I was being let onto the biggest secret of them all. Soon, our vacation time was split between chasing cattle on the ranch and chasing waves. The choice was made. I am a surfer now.

‍♂️ Surfer yay or nay, but hang onto your board, bro

What is a surfer? Does taking a single 1h lesson on vacay and popping up in the whitewater make you one? Is there a time required for length service or frequency? Even in the last 17 years, the definition has changed. We went from “being a surfer” to being a “person who surfs”. I used to think it mattered how invested you were in surfing. I no longer think that.  I used to be such a surfing purist. All I care about now is that anyone who gets in the water knows surf etiquette and how to hang onto their board whatever the conditions. Would I wish that everyone knew who Duke Kahanamoku was, that shortboarding came out of “girl boards”, and that you should care what the pocket is and bloody stay in it. Of course I do. And that’s why I upended my life (remember that life changing experience I mentioned, well, it had a delay switch) and started The Wipeout Weekly. It will make us all better surfers, whether we want it or not.

Take a sabbatical, but know the price

I’ve lived in Del Rey, a tiny neighborhood in Los Angeles Proper, just behind Marina del Rey and next door to Culver City and Venice for 9 years. I can cycle to the surf in 13 minutes. But there was a year when I barely went out surfing. Maybe I got busy, maybe I was pissed off with my lack of progress, maybe I got disillusioned. Honestly, I don’t remember. I didn’t miss it. I didn’t feel like I was missing out. We didn’t break up. But we were definitely on a break. I was still running “Girls Who Can’t Surf Good” (est. 2017), so I was exposed to “surf content” daily. I just didn’t surf.  If I could talk to my then-self, I would’ve told her to suck it up, fuzzball. That break didn’t do me any favors. Perhaps, there are people out there who benefit from taking a surfing sabbatical. Surfing is not like riding horses. It’s a muscle you need to keep exercising. Or you lose it. Surfing should never be about all or nothing. But it can’t be nothing or you will pay a steep price. Consistency pays dividends.

The less you go, the more you fear

I wasn’t scared when I started surfing. And I literally had to learn to swim, so I could take my first surfing lesson., so I could take my first surfing lesson. But the less I surfed, the more freaked out I got. Slowly, slowly, 2-3 feet waves became unachievable. I stopped getting out back. I returned to the whitewater. I’ve convinced myself that catching waves from a standing position is beneficial because I can see the smallest ripples that other surfers miss. It didn’t even feel like going backwards. It was worse. There was no injury, no horrific wipeout that led to this moment. I did this all to myself by surfing less and less.

Sometimes you need a push

And this is the girl who happily charged 3 feet+ waves in Bolinas, NorCal. The girl who didn’t care about catching breaking waves with a ripped off big toe nail in Santa Cruz. The girl who went out and went out and went out surfing with her friends. The lucky girl who met a group of experienced surfers who gave her that wee push. It cannot be overstated how beneficial it is to have people around you who know what they’re doing and who know what you’re capable of. You don’t need a surf buddy every time you go surfing, or coach to hold your hand in a busy lineup. But it helps when you’re learning that someone gives you a big kick up your backside, so you don’t get stuck. In absence of that someone, and as impossible this may seem, physically and otherwise, you have to kick your own ass. 

️ Buying gear is fun, but that’s not what this is about

I used buying surfing gear as a crutch. Oh, look at that cute new wetsuit. If I get it, I will definitely go out and surf more. Maybe I need a new board? That will speed up my progress massively. You know what, if I could put GoPro on my surfboard I could see where I am going wrong. It’s a trap. Don’t fall into it. You don’t need much to get better at surfing. Just make sure that the board you get fits your experience level, height, and weight. 

✈️ Book a surf holiday, prepare to be disappointed

It’s the waves. If I could only surf better waves, I’d be a world class surfer in no time. So, you book a surf camp, or retreat or travel where there are supposed to be better waves, you can surf sans wetsuit. Oh, the anticipation. This is going to be awesome, this is going to change everything. You may get lucky. Or you may quickly discover that the waves back home look almost identical to the ones your instructors want you to surf at the camp. Or the storm moves in, and what was supposed to be a gentle reef break turns into a messy monster. You get back home, your surf spirit broken, your pockets emptied.

Not all surfers are created equal

You’re back at your local break. But what is wrong with these people? Giving you a stink eye, telling you off. Treating you like you don’t know what you’re doing. There is no time nor place for kooksplaining. You have every right to feel aggravated. Just know that, sometimes, just sometimes, it comes from a place of love or life preservation. And even if it doesn’t, that surfer will most likely beat themselves up for telling you off when they cool down. You’re in the lineup to have a bit of fun, catch a wave, yell “woohoo”, commune with the ocean, but for some of these guys surfing is life, and waves have no place to be wasted.

Surfing is not a gentle sport

I walked into surfing with my eyes open. Male-dominated, aggressive, with a clearly established pecking order. I wish anyone who gets into surfing was both very aware of it, and also completely ignorant at the same time. So you can retain some of that magical thinking about what surfing actually is. The surfing you will experience will depend on where you surf, when you surf and who you surf with. There will be days when it will be beautiful and there will be days when it turns ugly. But it will always be worth it.

Know and love your craft, just not too much

I used to suffer from my serious OCD-like behavior. Little things bother me. A lot. A tiny scratch on my new surfboard would send me into a tailspin. It’s ruined! I’ll never go out on it ever again. Once my beautiful longboard got viciously attacked by a shortborder’s fin, I got over myself. I repair small dings all by myself. This year, I graduated to filling up bigger holes, using Q-cell, and resins. I put glitter in my resin. I sand my boards. My foamie is delaminating, but I’ll ride it until it gets waterlogged. Learning more about surfboards and how to fix them became one of my favorite pastimes. And I know when to take it to the shop. 

️ You can kid yourself that your shape doesn’t matter. On your head, dude

I surfed at 135lbs, and I surfed at 175lbs. I surfed when I was in my 30s. I surf now. But there’s no cheating your upper body strength and hip mobility. You have to put in the work. If you can’t surf a few times a week, you gotta do something, anything on land. Surfing is a physically demanding sport, there’s no cheat. The silver lining: the better the technique, the less tired you will start getting.

Don’t pretend you’re better than a foamie

I started on a 7’ 6’’ epoxy, graduated to 9’ 6’’ custom. Now, I’m back on my big ass foamie. Because the waves don’t co-operate and getting hit by a log hurts more. Because my pop-up will never improve with a crutch of a super stable board. Because I don’t deserve nice things. I see so many beginners losing their shit about what their progression board should be, how quickly they can downsize, should they ditch a foamie because it makes them look like, well, beginners. If you have to ask, you’ll never know. If you know, you need only ask.

I love surfing, but I am no longer in love with it

I see surfing for what it is. Warts and all. Writing about surfing, interviewing surfers, learning new things every single day made me a better surfer, and I feel it when I step into the liquid. Knowing how surfers think, what they’re scared of, and what they cherish most. It’s been a dream for the past 3.5 months, and I hope this is something I can for the rest of my life. You can help by subscribing to our free newsletter! Subscribe, pretty please.